Monday, April 6, 2009

Support System

After two years of constant headaches, I got my first article from a family member recently. It surprised me, pleasantly. There wasn't any information in the article that was new to me, which isn't shocking as my google-fu is out of control and borderline-obsessive, but it's the thought that counts. And the thought made me feel loved.

I've heard of people in my or similar situations feeling uncomfortable with unsolicited advice, its nature and frequency. While I have experienced a few instances of people making obvious suggestions based on inaccurate assumptions and did indeed find it irritating, I LOVE it when someone shows interest in helping me cure my woes. I am open to all ideas and want to try everything until something finally works. Except maybe bloodletting. Leeches? No thanks.

I rarely get suggestions from my family or friends because, for the most part, none of my family or friends has any idea what I deal with day-to-day. That is mostly my fault. I tend to sugarcoat the truth. I don't tell people that I spent the whole week in my robe on the couch with an icepack on my head, incapable of even microwaving food. I may mention that I had a bad week, if cornered. I don't like talking about it. I'm embarrassed and horrified by what my life has become. I don't want anyone to know about it! So, no one knows about it and I lament because I feel alone. Self-sabotaging martyr is what I am.

My very supportive boyfriend does his best to help me cope, physically and emotionally. But he is only one man.

My easiest and most reliable source of support in the internet. If I am feeling desperate or need help with a weird symptom, I can hop on the net and go searching for help. (I'm lucky that the computer doesn't trigger my head too much. If I close the laptop lid at the first symptom and leave it alone, I can usually avoid the repercussions. It's all about moderation.) I read a lot of blogs and newsreels and do a lot of googling about headaches and migraines. There are a lot of people out there having similar, if not the same, problems. They report a variety of symptoms, and even more varied treatments, some with total success and some who suffer for their lifetimes. Encouraging and disappointing at the same time, god bless the internet.